If you, your spouse, or your children have (or suspect have) ADHD, you know it can be a challenge. ADHD is Awesome: A Guide to (Mostly) Thriving with ADHD by Penn and Kim Holderness offers a humorous but honest look at living with this neurodivergence. (You might recognize the authors’ names from their online Holderness Family videos.) They use the term “awesome” intentionally, using all of the word’s meanings. “ADHD can be great, inspiring, incredible, eye-opening, marvelous, wondrous, staggering, and many other positive things. . . . Awesome can also mean hard to comprehend, overwhelming, challenging, or daunting” (xxiii-xxiv).
Penn has ADHD; Kim does not. This book is mostly from his perspective, but Kim has sections where she discusses the challenges of both being married to someone with ADHD and having a child with ADHD. While ADHD is Awesome takes a strength-based approach, emphasizing how ADHD can be an asset in life, it doesn’t shy away from the difficulties. As Penn states, “I’m going to share the good parts of having ADHD and try to find a way to laugh about the bad parts” (xxxv).
Common Features of ADHD
Common ADHD symptoms include inattention, hyperactivity, difficulties with impulse control, trouble listening, fidgeting, struggles with executive function, and time blindness (always being late and/or having a hard time estimating how long activities take). It can also have an emotional component, where emotions come on strong and then subside just as quickly.
While most of those features seem negative, there are good things about ADHD as well. Individuals with ADHD are often highly creative and can hyperfocus for long periods of time when working on something they are interested in.
Tips on How to Thrive
The Holdernesses discuss ways to thrive with ADHD in a world made for neurotypical individuals. Some of these include medicine, accommodations, taking care of physical health, using systems and routines, and having a supportive community.
There is a special section in this book for parents and caretakers offering realistic suggestions for helping your child thrive while acknowledging the mental load of managing a child’s ADHD can be heavy. Parents need support as well. Penn Holderness is a father and discusses the challenges of parenting while having ADHD. In most cases, however, a mother with ADHD will face additional challenges in parenting. Kim’s sections are invaluable, however, if you are a neurotypical woman married to a man with ADHD or parenting a child with this neurodifference.
As the mother of a teen girl with ADHD and dyslexia (which frequently go together), I’m on a constant quest to better understand how her brain works and find ways to help her navigate life. ADHD is Awesome is a valuable resource. I especially appreciated Penn’s willingness to laugh at himself. It can be tempting to always focus on the challenges of ADHD; having a sense of humor and focusing on the strengths those with ADHD have can go a long way in making life easier.
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